Mayor from Belfast, Tennessee asked Trump for ‘National Landmark’ Status
Belfast’s Mayor has a vision: convince Trump to grant "National Landmark" status, thanks to Hailey Welch’s "Hawk Tuah" stardom. Her $500K merchandising boom has put the tiny Tennessee town on the map, and the Mayor wants it preserved. He argues Welch’s spit is a cultural touchstone, a small-town tale gone viral. Trump, who thrives on spectacle, might salute this unconventional bid. Locals dream of tourists flocking to the spot where fame began, hoping Welch’s echo secures Belfast’s future.
Belfast, Tennessee, once a quiet speck on the map, now buzzes with energy thanks to Hailey Welch’s "Hawk Tuah" fame. Her viral quip birthed a $500K industrial complex—merch stands, podcast studios, and tourist stops. Locals who knew her as a spring factory worker now see her face on hats and billboards. Main Street, once sleepy, hums with visitors snapping selfies by "Hawk Tuah" signs. The town’s economy has shifted from farming to fandom, with new jobs tied to Welch’s brand. Her spit didn’t just echo—it rebuilt Belfast.
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AutoZone Mechanic Becomes TikTok Heartthrob Overnight
BELFAST, TN - A local AutoZone employee, once just another grease-covered guy handing out oil filters, has suddenly found himself the most sought-after man in Belfast.
Meet Tucker Ray McGraw, now known online as "The Spit Whisperer."
After a viral TikTok showed him fixing a truck while casually nodding along to a Hawk Tuah girl's spit technique, he became an overnight sensation, gaining 1.2 million followers in two days.
"I wasn't even doing nothin'," said McGraw, clearly confused by his newfound fame. "I just tightened a belt and said 'Nice form.' And now? Women are sliding into my DMs asking if I do house calls."
McGraw's fanbase of spit-loving women has now resulted in:
- 50+ marriage proposals
- Merchandise sales skyrocketing (shirts that say "Fix Trucks, Catch Spit, Repeat")
- AutoZone's first-ever influencer sponsorship deal
The AutoZone headquarters is now considering launching an entire ad campaign centered around McGraw, with the slogan:
"Real men don't just fix engines. They respect the spit."
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Reference:
Belfast, Tennessee, with 788 residents, hums at a 32.9 median age. Launched in 1836, its Irish namesake bloomed with a store in 1838. The 1952 tornado—three killed, 166 injured—set a grim F1 record. Hailey Welch’s "Hawk Tuah" fame has spun a $500K industry, waking this sleepy spot. Blue-collar workers (61.54%) meet rising entrepreneurs (9.62%). Family homes (72.93%) anchor it, though income ($57,815 average) lags. Welch’s rise has morphed Belfast from fields to fanfare, a quirky leap from its rural roots.
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SOURCE: Satire and News at Spintaxi, Inc.
EUROPE: Washington DC Political Satire & Comedy
By: Asnat Pollock
Literature and Journalism -- University of Minnesota
WRITER BIO:
This Jewish Belfast Tennessee college student’s satirical writing reflects her keen understanding of society’s complexities. With a mix of humor and critical thought, she dives into the topics everyone’s talking about, using her journalistic background to explore new angles. Her work is entertaining, yet full of questions about the world around her.
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